How to Survive Stalking: The Ultimate Safety Guide

Stalking isn’t a meet-cute. It’s a crime.

If you’ve ever had that sinking feeling that someone is watching you, following you, or showing up where they shouldn’t be, your gut might be trying to tell you something important. Stalking is a serious crime that affects millions of people, and the sooner you recognize the warning signs, the sooner you can take action to protect yourself.

In this guide, we’ll break down how to spot a stalker, what to do if you’re being stalked, how to protect yourself online and in real life, and how to help someone else dealing with a stalker. Because no one should have to live in fear.

What Counts as Stalking?

Stalking is more than just unwanted attention. It’s a pattern of behavior that makes someone feel unsafe, harassed, or fearful. It can include:

✔️ Repeated, unwanted messages, calls, emails, or social media interactions.
✔️ Showing up at your home, work, or places you frequent without a valid reason.
✔️ Tracking your location—through technology or by physically following you.
✔️ Sending unwanted gifts—flowers, letters, or other items designed to get your attention.
✔️ Damaging your property or leaving disturbing messages.
✔️ Spreading false information about you to others.
✔️ Escalating from harassment to threats or physical harm.

If someone’s actions make you feel trapped, anxious, or constantly on edge, that’s not a coincidence—it’s stalking.

The Red Flags: How Stalking Starts

Stalking often starts small—so small that victims may not take it seriously at first. Here are the early warning signs:

🚩 The ‘Coincidental’ Run-Ins – Someone always seems to “accidentally” be where you are. Grocery store, gym, coffee shop? A couple of times might be a coincidence. More than that? That’s a pattern.

🚩 Excessive Messages – One text? Fine. A dozen messages after you didn’t respond? 🚩🚩🚩

🚩 Unwanted Gifts – If you’ve rejected someone and they keep sending gifts, they’re not being romantic. They’re ignoring your boundaries.

🚩 Social Media Obsession – If they are watching, commenting, and interacting with every single post you make, they may be monitoring your movements.

🚩 Tracking or Surveillance – If you notice strange behavior like your car being tampered with, weird AirTags showing up in your belongings, or someone always knowing where you are, trust your instincts.

🚩 Escalation to Threats – If ignoring them makes them angry, aggressive, or threatening, that’s a major warning sign.

How to Protect Yourself from a Stalker

Once you recognize the red flags, it’s time to take serious action.

No Contact, No Engagement – Don’t respond, don’t explain, don’t try to “let them down easy.” Any interaction can fuel their behavior.

Block & Report – Block their number, block them on social media, and report concerning behavior to platforms and authorities.

Document Everything – Keep screenshots, texts, emails, photos of them near your home, and any incidents that make you feel unsafe.

Upgrade Home Security – Install a video doorbell, use door and window locks, and add security cameras if possible.

Change Your Routine – Take different routes home, mix up your schedule, and avoid predictable patterns.

Check for GPS Trackers – Stalkers have been known to use AirTags and other tracking devices. Check your car and belongings.

Secure Your Digital Life – Make social media private, turn off location tracking, and be careful about what you share online.

Carry Personal Safety Tools – Consider pepper spray, a personal alarm, or self-defense training.

Tell Someone You Trust – Don’t deal with this alone. A support network makes all the difference.

Report to Authorities – File a police report and seek a protective order if needed.

How to Help a Friend Who’s Being Stalked

If someone you know is being stalked, believe them and offer real support:

Listen Without Dismissing Their Fear – Avoid saying, “Are you sure you’re not overreacting?” Take them seriously.

Encourage Documentation – Help them keep records of every interaction for legal protection.

Offer to Go with Them to Report It – Many victims feel intimidated or dismissed by law enforcement. Having support helps.

Be Part of Their Safety Plan – Offer to check in with them, walk them to their car, or be their emergency contact.

Help Them Secure Their Home & Digital Life – Assist with setting up security measures and social media privacy.

Call for Help if They’re in Danger – If they signal distress, take action immediately.

Legal Options for Stalking Victims

If you’re being stalked, legal measures can help.

Restraining Orders & Protective Orders – These vary by state but can legally require the stalker to stay away from you.

Police Reports – Even if the police don’t take action immediately, filing a report creates a paper trail.

Legal Aid & Advocacy Groups – Organizations like VictimConnect (victimconnect.org) and the Stalking Prevention, Awareness, and Resource Center (stalkingawareness.org) can help.

State-Specific Resources – Every state has laws against stalking. You can find help through the National Center for Victims of Crime.

Final Takeaway: Not Today, Stalkers.

Stalking is not just annoying—it’s dangerous. If something feels off, trust your gut and take action.

If you think you’re being stalked, don’t ignore it.

f you need help, reach out to professionals.

If you know someone in danger, stand by them.

No one should have to live in fear. Stay aware, stay safe, and refuse to be clueless, careless, or caught off guard.

🙅‍♀️ Not today, stalkers.

📌 Listen to the full podcast episode for more expert advice, real-life case studies, and in-depth survival strategies. 🎧 Subscribe to How to Survive wherever you get your podcasts!

Don’t forget to follow us on social media, just search @crimecluess, share your thoughts, and let us know what you’d like to hear about in future episodes. If you have any true crime stories of your own, send them our way crimeclueless@gmail.com, to be featured on a future episode! And as always, remember: refuse to be clueless, careless, or caught off guard. Not today, murderers.

See you in the next episode of Crime Clueless!

Resources for victims and their loved ones:

National Stalking & Victim Support Resources

1️⃣ VictimConnect Resource Center – A confidential, nationwide service offering help for victims of stalking and other crimes. Call 1-855-4-VICTIM (1-855-484-2846) for support.

2️⃣ Stalking Prevention, Awareness, and Resource Center (SPARC) – Provides educational materials, risk assessments, and safety planning guides for stalking victims.

3️⃣ National Domestic Violence Hotline – Supports victims of intimate partner stalking. Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)for 24/7 assistance.

4️⃣ Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN) – Provides crisis support for stalking victims who experience sexual violence or harassment. Call 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) for confidential help.

5️⃣ Office for Victims of Crime (OVC) – Crime Victim Services Directory – A nationwide tool to find local stalking victim services and legal aid.

6️⃣ National Center for Victims of Crime – Advocacy and resources for stalking victims, including legal advice and safety planning.

Legal & Restraining Order Assistance

7️⃣ AZPOINT – Arizona Protective Order Filing System – For Arizona residents needing a protective order or injunction against harassment. Most states have similar systems available.

8️⃣ WomensLaw.org – Provides state-by-state legal information about restraining orders, stalking laws, and protection options.

9️⃣ Shouse Law Group – Stalking Laws by State – An in-depth guide to stalking laws in all 50 states, penalties, and legal protections available.

🔟 Legal Aid Directory – Find free or low-cost legal help for restraining orders and stalking-related legal issues.

Cyberstalking & Digital Privacy Protection

1️⃣1️⃣ National Cybersecurity Alliance – Online Privacy Guide – Learn how to lock down your digital presence to prevent cyberstalking and tracking.

1️⃣2️⃣ Privacy Rights Clearinghouse – How to Remove Personal Information Online – A step-by-step guide on how to opt out of data broker sites to protect yourself from stalkers accessing personal information.

Resources for this episode:

Stalking Laws & Legal Resources

1️⃣ Arizona Revised Statutes § 13-2923 – Stalking Laws – Arizona’s official stalking law, outlining what constitutes stalking and the legal penalties.

2️⃣ Shouse Law Group – Stalking Laws by State – A state-by-state breakdown of stalking laws, legal consequences, and what victims can do.

3️⃣ WomensLaw.org – Restraining Orders & Stalking Protection – Provides detailed information on protection orders for stalking victims in all 50 states.

4️⃣ Office for Victims of Crime (OVC) – Stalking & Victim Services – A government directory to help victims find legal aid and advocacy services.

Stalking Prevention, Awareness & Victim Support

5️⃣ Stalking Prevention, Awareness, and Resource Center (SPARC) – A leading organization for stalking education, risk assessment, and safety planning.

6️⃣ National Center for Victims of Crime – Includes stalking safety tips, research studies, and advocacy resources.

7️⃣ VictimConnect Resource Center – A confidential helpline for stalking victims. Call 1-855-4-VICTIM (1-855-484-2846).

8️⃣ National Domestic Violence Hotline – Stalking & Intimate Partner Violence – Stalking is often linked to domestic violence, and this resource provides 24/7 support. Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).

Case Study & True Crime Research

9️⃣ Murder of Shana Grice – Wikipedia – The tragic case of Shana Grice, a young woman who was stalked and murdered after police ignored her reports.

🔟 BBC News – Shana Grice Stalking Murder Case – Coverage of the police failures in Shana Grice’s case and how stalking laws need to improve.

1️⃣1️⃣ The Independent – Stalking Victims Failed by Police – Investigative report on how law enforcement often dismisses stalking cases until it’s too late.

1️⃣2️⃣ RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) – Stalking & Harassment – Provides statistics, safety planning advice, and survivor support.

Stalking Victimization, 2019 – Bureau of Justice Statistics

https://bjs.ojp.gov/library/publications/stalking-victimization-2019

Robert John Bardo (born January 2, 1970) is an American man serving life imprisonment without parole after being convicted for the July 18, 1989, murder of American actress and model Rebecca Schaeffer, whom he had stalked for three years.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_John_Bardo